Blogpost #8: Romantic Rejection

If you listen to emo songs, what does the vocalist was trying to say to us? He/she was trying to tell us he/she did some painful experience like break up relationships or being dumped by his/her partner. Breaking up relationships are the same as romantic rejection. What is romantic rejection? Romantic rejection is an interaction of heterosexual relationships are going to be seperated. This kind of pain is like someone punched you through the gut and it's inevitable to face the situationg of being rejected by a partner.

I remember that when I was in high school that I had a relationship with someone and we spent together happily in school. When summer began to start, our relationships between us were starting to fade until I broke up with her because she never spent time with me even I began to notice that she was avoiding me for being so clingy to her like I didn't give her too much space until she broke up with me. After being rejected by her, I began to get confused and uncontrollable on myself like I'm being possessed by the soul of depression. I know that I'm not the person who have experienced romantic rejected, there are also others who have experienced this pain.


After I began to notice that why this situation hurts too much. I read two articles about romantic rejection. The first article that I read is "Why the Pain of Romantic Rejection Feels Like a Punch in the Gut" by Alice Park. This article tells about the experimentation of Edward Smith that he had 40 participants to examine them each to put them through  functional MRI to measure their brain of what will happen to them when Smith showed their pictures of their exes and their good friends. The result of this experimentation is that their brain gets more pain when looking the picture of their exes than looking the picture of their close friends.

According to Smith which was in the article said that "I find it hard to believe that taking aspirin would really help much in true rejection. Even if you took aspirin and it helped, just thinking about the rejection experience would brint pain back, and it's hard to tell people not to think about painful emotional experiences like that."

He was trying to say that even if use any medicine such as aspirin to expare your feeling on pain, the pain will go back over and over.

The second article that I read is called  "Mental Illness and Romantic Rejection" by Kate Bingiorno. This topic tells about how people react when they fall in love with someone and how they feel when they got dumped, rejected or seperated. It tells also about that how she had experienced by his crush of being dumped in her adolescence life and how will she manage to adjust behavior on herself.

 According to Bingiorno, "Once you say something, it's in the records forever, and you don't just try again tomorrow. As a result, I had a habit of replaying that happened, and trying to find the alternative route."

She was trying to say that when do something wrong with your crush or relationships, the memory will never be erased even if you change the way your are it will still going to recollect your mistakes and it will possible that he/she will reject you. For example, you farted in front of your crush in school and he/she will get to start to turn off on you. Even if the time had passed, your crush will remember of what you did in front of him/her.

If you're having a hard time after breaking up with your partner. I suggest that you learn have to move on. I know that "moving on" is such a big word to us that every time people told us to move even though we can't here are my tips the ways of moving on:

1) Learn from your mistakes that you promise not to do it again so that if you have another partner with someone, you will know what to do next to him/her

2) If you have nothing else to do at home or school, try to do some activities like exercising to minimize your emotional stress or try to study hard to make you a better person.

3) If he/she wants to be with your again, try start as being friends. I know it's hard to forgive sometimes after you've been through with him/her. Being friends with him/her is like you learn his/her nature again until you know his/her true colors.

4)Try to hang out with your friends because they are the one who is going to make you happy.

5) If you still can't move on, try to help from your parents of how you feel because parents know best.

I think that's all I got the ways of moving on.